I'm a mom of 2 and have had a nanny share for 5 years. It makes childcare cheaper, but the logistics can be complicated.
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- A nanny share is when two or more families have one nanny taking care of their kids.
- Sharing a nanny can reduce the cost for the families and have more flexible schedules.
- But they can also come with a lot of logistic and planning which can be overwhelming.
As a working mom of two, I know that navigating the confusing — and expensive — world of childcare can be stressful. There are several factors to consider, and what works for one family may not work for another. After plenty of discussion, my family landed on a nanny share.
If you're not familiar, a nanny share is an arrangement where kids from two or more families are cared for by one nanny. The families "share" the nanny. Nanny shares typically involve kids who are around the same age so that their schedules and stages of development align.
In over five years of nanny shares, here's what I've learned.
There are tradeoffs
Kids in a nanny share benefit from socialization since they spend time with another child, but they still get more personalized attention than they might get from a larger childcare environment. They also have less exposure to the typical day care germs, which means less missed work for parents.
There are financial benefits, too. Typically, families pay a nanny in a share two-thirds of a standard nanny rate. So each family pays less than they would for a private nanny, and the nanny makes more than they would working for just one family.
But there are downsides. Since personal relationships are involved, nanny shares feel less transactional than a day care environment. As with any relationship, there can be times of tension, and you might have to have some tough conversations.
While nanny shares can have a lot of flexibility with schedules during the day, they have less flexibility with total hours of care. Many daycares have extended hours, but nanny hours are defined unless you plan ahead and pay more. Finally, even though you save money compared to a private nanny, shares still tend to be more expensive than larger childcare environments.
There are a lot of logistics
You have flexibility with a nanny share, but that also means you have to sort through logistics. Talking through how your kids and nanny will move through the day can help identify where you want to dig in and discuss more.
Where and when will the kids nap? Where will they eat? Who will provide another travel crib and high chair? If you're alternating houses, who will bring these items back and forth, and when? How do you feel about outings? Do you need a double stroller and car seats in the nanny's car? If so, how will the families split the cost? Are there any older siblings in either family that might require occasional care? These are all questions the families should be asking before setting up a share.
Have a detailed contract
To make sure that everyone is on the same page, it's important to get as much information in writing as possible. A contract should outline things like job requirements, expectations for paid time off, sick policies, and termination rights. The more you can anticipate up front, the better.
Everyone should have a chance to review and weigh in before the contract is signed.
Hosting has its benefits and drawbacks
In a nanny share, either one family hosts consistently or the two families alternate hosting. There are tradeoffs for each scenario.
The family that hosts gets the convenience of avoiding a commute and not having to pack up all of their child's belongings each day. However, they deal with some wear and tear. We've had toys broken and books ripped. Share hosts also have to store extra items, like a high chair and pack-and-play.
Sometimes, families easily agree on hosting — maybe one family doesn't have enough space to host, or a parent works from home and doesn't want to be distracted. I personally preferred to host when my kids were little so that I could breastfeed during the day when possible.
My family loves having a nanny share
As with most decisions, there are pros and cons to nanny shares. Since we all have different preferences and priorities, whether to move forward with a nanny share will depend on how you personally weigh the pros and cons.
There have been lessons learned and bumps in the road, but for my family, the benefits of a nanny share outweighed any downsides.
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